Changes

I knew right away.

Black and white pictures. That's what I want. Just my face.

This one's going to be real personal.

I knew right away I wanted to dedicate this shoot to giving light to my darkness.

Specifically, I wanted to give light to my anger that once felt so dark and scary.

In the past 2 years, I have been invited by anger herself. To know her. To speak her. To dance her. To become her.What I once feared and was taught was an entity outside of myself turned out to be the most awakening part of myself. It felt kind of crazy to be meeting myself for the first time. I mean, come on. All of a sudden, my body is sharing parts of myself I had never known. I became friends with her. My anger. It wasn't like I had heard others talk about her. It certainly didn't feel scary like I thought it would.

No, she felt powerful. She felt liberating. She felt so good.

The more and more I moved her, she started to teach me.

She taught me what a "NO" felt like. She taught me what I deeply cared about.

She taught me to stand up for myself with all of my strength.

She taught me sacred rage. She taught me to be me.

And she taught me there was so much underneath the anger. Oh, did she show me the way to get to the core of many wounds. I thank her so damn much. It was not easy.

And that's why I wanted to capture her and the work we have done together.

No longer fearing a big part of you is a big deal.

We get to remember who we are, who we always have been.

And not shame ourselves for who we really are, but to truly accept and meet her with wonder.

So I dedicate this shoot to all the women who have been afraid to give light to their darkness.

Who have been too afraid to meet this part of themselves because of what they were taught, because they wanted to deeply belong and be accepted.

And I dedicate this shoot to every woman who, one day, will meet all the parts of herself with so much love.

Who will give voice to the parts of her that were shut down.

Who will feel so alive because she chose to deeply feel, to remember.

Thank you to my lovely husband for capturing my vision and making it a reality.

I can't say how thankful I am to create art with you and for you to generously share your gifts and talents with me.

Last but not least, thank you to my Ishtara teacher for creating a practice that brought me face to face with myself like I could have only imagined in my wildest dreams.

And to my Ishtara students (past, present, & future), I do this for you.

I do this so that more and more of us can feel whole and never leave any parts of us behind.

- Nereyda

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